I'm so stupid. I hate kids so I'm not sure why I'm hanging out with a bunch of them. The things I do for love. I had a fortune cookie advise me to seek to find what I'm yearning for. Of course I came up with this brilliant idea to hang out with a bunch of kids in the hopes of getting Nik back.
I am so glad that Spencer likes me. He's probably the only kid I'll ever like. His mom must have been awesome or maybe the awesome comes from his dad since Nik is pretty damn spectacular. I had a dream about him last night. We were floating in a tub of chicken soup. Now I want some chicken soup.
One of the kids nearly knocked me out today. The fart that kid let go was horrible. It was just awful. I've never smelled anything so bad. It made me want to jump into a vat of vomit since that would be more pleasant. I'm just glad the kid turned red and ran off. I should have looked for her but I'm sure she's fine. If it was me I would have went for some ice cream but luckily for me I don't have that kind of problem. Some people fart while others don't. I'm one of the ones that don't unless I'm all alone. I've managed to avoid farting in front of people for my whole life which isn't easy but I plan to keep it that way since some things are just meant to be private.
Today has been one hell of a day. That bitch Maya recorded me. Sure I said something that sounds bad but the bitch didn't have to record me. She should get fired. I decided to come clean with Aly. I thought it was worth a shot. I do like the girl.
When I told Aly about the recording things didn't turn out the way I hoped they would. She wanted nothing to do with me and I can't really blame her for that. Damn that stupid Maya. What is up with that stupid bitch? It's like she's out to ruin my life.
I had to do something. I consulted my psychic and decided to sneak into the castle. I was able to dress up as a knight. I didn't really give it much thought. I didn't think about the part where I'd have to ride a horse. I'm surprised I stayed on it for as long as I did. Of course I have no idea how to use a sword so I totally sucked at the battling part of the show. I did manage to give Aly the carnation because I knew she wanted one even though there are better flowers but my opinion on them doesn't matter. Anyhoo I thought I was a goner when that dude was holding a blade to me.
I thought I was dead for real even though I should have known better. Things turned out great because Aly came to my rescue. It was pretty awesome. I think she's going to forgive me. I just wonder how I got that carnation. It was like it appeared in my hand which just happened to be behind my back at the time. Maybe it was magic. Or maybe it was Aly's mom helping me out. I'd like to think she'd like me. From now on when I go to the castle I want to be in the audience because being part of the show is too hard.
I love my hat. I love feathers. I'm the only one that has a hat like this. It is a special hat. It sometimes talks to me when I'm bored. It is a lovely hat. I want another hat but I'm not sure I'll be able to find another like it.
I saw Mercy eyeing my hat. I just know she covets it. She can't have my hat. I love my hat. I want more hats. I want a room full of nothing but hats. I wish I could find a spell to create them but so far I haven't had any luck.
I feel the envy whenever I go out. I know Anne wants my hat too. No one has a hat like I do. That is how it should be. I'm the most fashionable women in this village. Tituba is jealous of that but she knows her place. I just wish she wouldn't glare so much at Mercy. Mercy will never replace her in my eyes.
I really love ribs. I also love the bibs. I have a wall full of them. They are so darn cute. I've never shared my love of bibs with anyone before but that could change.
I am so excited about the toys in the Happy Meals. I'm gong to have to get a lot of them so I'm able to get all the toys. I really hate it when I'm not able to get them all. I'll get Felix to help me out.
I just found out that my favorite psychic is moving away. Now that just sucks. I need to find out what's going to happen in my future. Is the man of my dreams in my life yet or is he still out there?
I love Fridays. They always bring me good luck. I love that it is Friday the 13th. Others are scared of the day but I embrace it in every way. I'm thinking about getting a black cat.
I'm going to go see Hope. I want to get to know my daughter. I need to be a part of her life. I also want to know why she's back with Liam. I guess what they say about love being blind is true. I just don't get it but I don't know the man.
I can't stop thinking about Bill. I don't know why but I'm dreaming about him more nights than I'd like to admit. Last night we were soaking in a hot tub together. Damn he looks good with his shirt off. Maybe all my women troubles are the universe's way of telling me that I'm really into men or maybe Bill's just the exception.
I do plan on getting my cards read. I need some psychic guidance on how to deal with the whole father thing. I'm not very good at it but I'm going to give it a try. Maybe Hope will go with me to get some ice cream. I love ice cream. If I do get a cat I'll name it Rocky Road.
I can't believe it. Brooke has my outfit. She wore it in public and I wore my outfit in public too. Oh the horrors. I never thought we'd ever wear the same thing. It was one thing sharing men but having the same outfit is just unbearable.
I'm going to burn it and never wear those two colors together ever again. I can't believe I wore the same outfit as the whore of LA. I hope no one noticed. Thorne didn't say anything so I"m guessing he never saw Brooke in the same outfit. I am glad that I can stay in LA. I'm sure I can help Aly through this trying time. I did kill her mother so I kind of owe the girl. My psychic told me that this was going to be a month of ups and downs. I guess the outfit is the down while Aly's transformation is the up.
I want to put a seesaw in the bedroom. I hope Thorne likes it. I don't want to put in a stripper pole but I did decide to sign up for a class. Strippers burn off so many calories working the pole. I guess if someone took my license to practice I could do a little stripping. I think it might be fun. I just wonder if I could wear a bag over my head. I'm not sure I'd want people to know about that if I ever do it. I do know what music I'd like to play while stripping. Now I'm craving cherry pie. I really should get to the bakery before it closes so I can get my sweet fix.
Oh my god Toadie hugged me. It felt so good having his arms around me. I just wish Sonya wasn't around. Toadie smells so good. I'm not sure what he smells like but I want it. I should snoop around his place to see if it's a laundry detergent or maybe a cologne.
Why did Sonya have to be there? I'm sure I would have gotten more than a lousy hug if she was out of the picture. I know what I should do. I should look for all those extra oranges and load them up into one of those machines that spit out balls for people that play tennis or baseball. I'm sure that would take her out of the picture. The only problem with Toadie is his lack of money. The man's a lawyer but he's clearly not exactly bringing in the big bucks.
I think I'm going to get some licorice. There are times when I wish I could just give up men completely but I couldn't imagine my life without them in it. I should look into cloning. I could let Sonya keep her husband if I'm able to get a copy of him. I wonder if he's a good kisser. If he can't kiss I'm sure I can teach him a few things that would curl Sonya's hair. I need to go online and start searching right now.
I've had a weird day. I was in LA and then I was on a plane. I'm so glad I have a fast jet that will take me halfway across the world in minutes instead of a day and a half. That's really handy because I really wanted to stop the wedding.
I keep thinking of that picture that Quinn sent me. I couldn't stop looking at it. I knew it was my duty to stop this farce of a wedding. I'm so having a donut soon unless I drown. It is pretty strange to fall out of a helicopter. For a while it felt like I was floating down to the sea. I just know Bill was behind this. He was so jealous when I punched him and stole Logan away from him. I'm just not sure if Bill realizes that I want to be his bride.
I really believe that destiny wants me to be with Bill. Everything is falling perfectly into place. Quinn provided me exactly what I needed at the exact right time. I would never have dared to admit to myself just how much I'm in love with Bill Spencer. That totally explains why I was always so angry at him. I was just jealous of Katie. I wanted to be with him and hated Katie for being his wife. Well it is my turn now damn it. Bill Spencer will be mine.
This place sucks. I really hate it here. My head feels so cold and now I know why. There's a guy that looks like me. He even sounds like me. He also has my hair. I'm freaking bald. I don't know when that happened.
I wish they'd at least give me a hat to keep my head warm. I like sitting on the floor. I can't really move much but it is a nice change from the bed. That bed is hard as a rock. Oh that reminds me I have a grandson named Rocco. Or did I just dream that? I'm not sure what's real anymore.
There has to be a way to get out of here. I might try to avoid taking my pills but that probably won't work. I can't fight back while I'm wearing this stupid thing. I can't even remember what this thing is called. If only I had someone here with me to help me out but I'm on my own and everyone in Port Charles thinks this bastard is me. I'm going to kill this bastard. I have no idea who he is and why he looks like me. It's really creepy. It could be a hallucination.
I can't believe it. RJ has a sword necklace. That stupid Bill Spencer gave my son a sword necklace. I can't believe it. I'm jealous of my own son. I had another dream about Bill last night. I was in Baskin-Robbins getting an ice cream cake.
I was behind Bill and all of a sudden he turned around. He kissed me and we started making out in front of everyone. Throne was behind the register but his hair was red instead of blonde. I was holding a ticket and my number was called. I went up to Thorne and someone threw a pie in my face. After that I woke up.
I need to stop thinking about Bill and Brooke. I'm jealous. I hate being jealous. Katie makes me happy but she isn't Bill. I'm not sure what I should do. I'm tempted to jump on a plane and stop the wedding but I don't want to hurt Katie. But what about me and my hurt feelings? I swear Bill feels something for me. I could feel it when we were rolling around on his desk. If only we hadn't been interrupted by Brooke. I really think something would have happened between us.
Random pictures and random diary entries. I seem to be a diary slut. Maybe these will amuse or maybe people will run away.